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We are finally welcoming a ‘chungkin’ into the family!
And even as I publish this news, I’m still a little unsure, scared, worried, nervous & excited – about it being real, that it is actually happening. Because there’s still a mix of surrealism & doubt swimming in my mind as I type this post…
* that anything may still happen at any point (don’t blame me for my pessimism, it actually happened to a few people I know – what were the odds, right?),
* that I’m baring my heart out and sharing something so personal on a very public platform… (okay maybe getting knocked up wasn’t a big deal for some of you)
because this entire journey was in no way an easy one for us (you can have the best gynae, best advanced science & medicine, pay lots of hard-earned money towards trying out treatments, be told that nothing is wrong with the both of us and it can all still not work out). Anyone that was closed to us knew that.
And now that we’ve gotten slightly past the start line towards parenthood, we are completely thankful, grateful, appreciative, overwhelmed…
Though it’s still early days for us and we’ve a long road ahead; I want to take a moment to thank supportive friends & families who have been keeping us in their thoughts, prayers & wishes. It’s also been immensely heartening to see ex-colls turned friends who’ve been squealing with joy the moment they guessed the between a bump or a beer belly; and diligently taking care of my well-being, diet and basically just about everything.
Being bestowed one of the greatest rewards & gifts from the heavenly Father is truly amazing… and has indeed been a wonderful experience so far (yes, despite the many fear stories I’ve been told time & again).
There’s a little beanie growing inside me, and by God’s Grace & will, we’re going to have a cozy family of our own really soon!
No more waiting, pinning & crying.
We can’t wait!
wedding bells
Its been exactly a year since I last attended a wedding. And today was one of my very good friend and ex-classmate, Daphne’s.
We were honoured when she informed us some months back that we were her first choice of bridesmaids (lol, I suddenly feel like a product). Although we did gasped a little and frantic around to do some last minute shopping at the nearby heartland mall on Friday night when she told us about her purple-themed wedding though. Especially Fi & me, thank goodness for the existence of many blogshops that saved us the hassle of shopping for a dress at least!
Well, I think I must have gotten too excited about being involved in Daphne’s wedding (that include sabotaging the groom & his band of brothers) that I couldn’t sleep till 2am. Woke up at 4am because the weather was acting up (apparently its because it was about to rain hence the extreme humidity). Slept back again at 4.30am and then up for real at 5.50am to get ready. Picked the girls up at 7am in the heavy pouring rain, reached the bride’s house at 7.30am and got busy trying to prepare 3 main tasks for the groom to tackle before he was allowed to see the bride.
Thankfully I was able to catch a nap for 2-3 hours in the afternoon before getting dressed for the cocktail reception & dinner later that evening. I could feel my lids getting really heavy and in desperate need of sleep towards the end of the morning session.
Anyway, just wanted to say I had fun. It was a beautiful albeit almost teary one as I watched my good friend grace down the aisle all smiles.
J&D, here’s wishing both of you lots of joy, bliss & laughter in your marriage.
Marriage, Singlehood and a few random thoughts
I woke up with some random thoughts from my post coffee session with a friend yesterday.
Our 1st half of the conversation was mainly about marriage, having kids and my friend lamented how having a kid has greatly impacted his & his wife’s independence in all things, especially when it came to travelling and/or working abroad. So his advice to a lot of people, including me was to have as much fun as we wanted, travel as much as we desired because once a family came, a lot of sacrifices needed to be made. No matter how much you remind yourself not to change the fun part you love about yourself. He cited 2 examples of people we both knew, and yeah…I had to agree. I think this friend wanted to remain a ‘cool dad’ for his kid for as long as possible.
After some gibberish on other topics, he also asked if I missed singlehood.
I wasn’t sure if he was looking for someone to resonate with, because I’ve actually not been asked this question since my wedding some 2.8 years ago. So I hadn’t given it much thought.
Yes, occasionally when disagreements on finances, housing, overseas career opportunities, having kids, raising kids arise between husband & wife, its easy to think how great life would be if we were just back to being single & carefree. We could make decisions for ourselves as we please and continue to ‘stay true’ to our heart.
But when you choose to marry that someone you’ve been dating because you both want to bring the relationship to another commitment level, you somehow feel oblige to always care & consider about the other person’s feelings in most decision makings. In some cases, your spouse’s family feelings too. And that, as most couples will tell you is the parcels of marriage.
I guess what I’m trying to conclude about this conversation is the ‘grass is always greener’ analogy. We always yearn for what we can’t have, and think that things might have been better if we weren’t in the current situation we’re in.
The ‘IFs’.
Take me for example. I’ve always assumed that marriage could lead to having a home to call our own. That I’d have co-ownership of everything, especially the kitchen, for times when I wanted to experiment with food, feel a little adventurous and invite some friends over for a lovely dinner & drinks session, and not fight kitchen/stove space with 2 other in-laws and frustrate myself not being able to locate utensils and cutlery because of their preference in placement around the kitchen. Heck, I could even just walk around the house not caring what I wore to sleep in because it was just me, him and perhaps some dogs. How much fun would that be, just us both in a home designed with our preference only in mind!
But again, this is a parcel of my marriage for the past 2.8 years but I’ve learn to accept it.
Friend console me by saying that living with in-laws has its merits too, such as having them help look after kids if we do have them (although I’d very much like to be involved and not rely on others so much).
But I’d like to cross that bridge only when I come to it, so from now till that time comes, I’d love my private space, anytime. Even if it means racking my brains on what to cook even if I could just rely on the convenience of mil’s delicious cantonese cooking.
Just a few random thoughts.
The wedding album of randoms – finally
“This day, I will marry my best friend. The one who shares my dreams, live and love.”
{Click the link to view album}
marriage changeth things
A week into marriage and its been wow, WoW, WOW!
All’s been good and nice. I now have a hearty breakfast laid on the table every morning instead of ta-baoing some unhealthy chee chong fun or nasi lemak from the coffeeshop at my workplace. The husband now sends me to the MRT station, which is only a 5 minute train ride from my destination (15 minutes journey in total) and picks me up from the workplace as before – so I definitely saved on my previous impulsive cab spending. And the husband now calls me more than the usual just to tell me how much he misses me. :)
Marriage has also gotten the husband boldly cheeky. Over the weekend, we went to buy some underpants I needed. My brief to him was merely to hunt for no VPLs and he came back with a plethora of thongs, midi, boy shorts, brazilian etc. My goodness. He even highlighted how the better NVPLs had some ‘butt-lift’ effect and was great for wearing beneath jeans and skirts. There were even color recommendations for which ones were more suited for the Summer versus the boring black and beiges. And I couldn’t believe it when he asked me to buy them all instead of choosing some (like how I intended) because they were at a good deal! Haha! And I thought he hunting high & low for a suitable body suit for my cheongsam a month ago was just a one-off!
Marriage has made the husband more protective too. We were at Polo Jeans shopping, and he was asking the sales associate if there were any skirts / jeans suitable for me. The lady recommended some sheer short skirt which she said was really apt for the Summer – only to have him joked back “I won’t allow my wife here to wear anything so skimpy! Unless its for me and me only”. Okay, so maybe that’s just selfish instead of protective. Hah! But the intention was very well-appreciated nonetheless. :)
Marriage has made the husband nag more. More at my spending actually. Always reminding me if its necessary for that extra bag/clothes/shoes that I want to purchase. And more often than not, the fashion-savvy husband always make the right call, differentiating a good buy from an impulse one. He actually remembers all the bags and shoes I have and will always remind me that I have a similar one whenever I ask if something on display is nice. Comforting to have a husband who understands my fashion well enough to exercise caution and control aptly.
Marriage has made the husband more sensitive to my emotions, needs and more huggy. He notices my frowns and smiles, angst and whats nots.
Marriage has made me more willing. To go the extra mile that is. The husband got quite sick just hours after our wedding and the illness stuck with him for a week. As tired and lazy I was to get out of bed almost every night to get him his medication and water, I knew I had to because I wanted him to recover. And doing that also made me realize what my mom went through all these years while I was sick.
Marriage has made me more weary of spending. I now look out for value (still won’t compromise aesthetics for it though) whenever we shop for household products. If its too expensive, I will deter the husband from spending. Too cheap, and I’ll jump at the opportunity. Makes me feel like a mini-auntie at times, but it does feel good to know that I saved the husband a few hundred dollars without compromising on quality. And having said that, we got 2 steals at the 1st ever GSS sale Widhjaya had over the weekend!
Marriage has made me smile much more and not fret over the tiny things anymore. Gossips, sabotage, jealousy are the least of my concerns, for I know God has blessed me with a man who loves me dearly so. It makes you see the bigger picture / things in life – that there’s more to fulfilment than get all petty with some other goose and rats who fail to see the goodness in things.
Marriage has also gotten me busier than usual! I now have less time to blog, MSN, surf the net – spending most of the evenings catching up with Bo on our day, spending time watching a DVD and by then its 1am!! And on this aspect, I really got to learn how to manage time more properly. So many things to do, so little time.
So marriage has indeed change things. Mostly good stuff.
And I’m contented. :)
Our Wedding
I was also very blessed with a pair of angels. BFF and BR were such sweethearts, sleeping over & squeezing in my tiny bedroom for the night. They got me some dinner (as I didn’t have the time to eat for the entire day, while settling last minute stuff), helped packed my bags and cleaned the house, went through guests list, before shoo-ing me to bed at 11.30pm (3 hours off schedule). We had a “mini-crisis” when I realized that Luke hadn’t passed me my box of loose flowers for the hair-do! But I knew everything was going to be alright when the girlies promptly set off for Luke’s place in their PJs and settled that for me.
Br & Bff just woke up!
14 June 2008, 5am: Mom greeted me with a big warm hug. I woke up with eager anticipation & excitement, despite not getting any sleep. It worry me for a bit that the dark eye circles and bags were probably going to show…but I knew I was in my makeup-artist’s good hands. Plus, the perk-me-ups facial and eye masks helped tremendously too!!! While getting my hair blown dry, mom scooped me a pipping hot bowl of fish porridge, and another hot bowl of bird’s nest (delicious!). JH, my mua, joked that I was getting such ‘Diva treatment’! “Once in a lifetime!” I exclaimed back!
a mask works wonders…
It wasn’t long before my videographer & photographer arrived and soon the clicking and filming began. It was all very exciting – being the centre of attention, a little overwhelming I must say, but nice. I was apprehensive initially, fearing that the mood between myself and the professional crew may be a little awkward, but it turned out really fun when we realized how much we could “click” with our similar sense of humour. The Bs, being their very loony selves, also contributed to plenty more of laughs!
An hour and half later (which honestly felt like minutes), I saw Ning (N2) & Spanky, Kris, my godparents & godbro, Sam, Mabes, Zann, Cecilia, Galvin make their appearance. Everyone was excited and busy cam-whoring with & without me. Hah! Mum and popo were also busy making sure our guests were comfy, while getting their makeup done. The house was bustling with immense joy & laughter!
One thing happened after the other and before I knew it, Luke sang a song and came through the room door, presenting me my bouquet and doing the traditional ‘un-veiling’ and kissing the bride.
The next hour happened in a twinkle of an eye. We snapped some photos with my side of the family & friends, drank some “tong shui” for prosperity, and headed to Luke’s place for our 1st tea ceremony session. As we only offered tea to his immediate family, the tea ceremony was a rather short one. While the groom and the rest of the family were getting ready to go to the church for rehearsals and receive guests, I took the perfect opportunity to cool down and stripped out of the wedding gown. And it felt sooooo good. Ethel & Cecilia were such darlings, helping me put on and off my gown at least thrice (I kept feeling the urge to go to the loo) and feeding me in-between!
It was 10.55am when the bridal car arrived at the entrance of the church. My heart was filled with butterflies – all excited that in a few minutes, we were going to be “officially” married! The car door opened, and as I stepped out, I could feel a huge veil of joy enveloping me. At that instant, I felt so ready, all prepared for the doors to open, to march in. I even forgot my concern of wobbling or tripping on my 3.5 inch heels! My mind was filled with nothing but joy & pleasant surprises – seeing the many smiley faces, realizing that so many guests were here to witness our beautiful matrimony – that meant and said a lot. At that moment, my initial laments of having such a long aisle to march in dissipated too. Every step I took as Pachabel’s Cannon in D was being played, was magical. The kiddies were perfect too. No tantrums, no confusion or sudden shyness from the multitude as the doors opened, but pure perfection & dedication in every step. I managed to take a peek at the floral deco along the aisle too. It was done the way I wanted it, and again I was blessed with such a wonderful florist (so you see, t
he earlier incident when the former florist played out on me was a big blessing in disguise).
We had a very lovely church service. Although there were little booboos like Luke slipping the wedding ring on my wrong hand, which resulted in me slipping and FORCING & JAMMING his wedding band in his wrong hand (before some quick correction after the videographer whispered), and walking towards the wrong direction to sign the marriage certificate (it was different from our one and only rehearsal!), it was indeed memorable. Guests later told us during the lunch reception that they teared during the bridal march-in & vows, and also shared with us how much they enjoyed the church service. It was good to know that the guests were having as much fun as we were!
Fast-forward 2 hours later, we were in the Raffles Hotel suite getting ready for our wedding dinner in The Ballroom. Bobo was getting as much rest as he could from not sleeping a wink the night before and being sick. While I was busy going through with BR on the co-ordination of the dinner, and getting ready for my 2nd makeup session with JH. :) Managed to get about 20 minutes of shut-eye before slathering another face & eye mask in an attempt to re-awake & rejuvenate the skin, before JH arrived. She was another sweetie too. Called me earlier to ask if I wanted more flowers since she saw some very nice white roses at the florist.
I’m not a fan of sitting and waiting, especially when it comes to makeup, hair & nails! But with JH, it was very different. We would giggle, joke and talk about almost everything, and she was also very accommodating, allowing me to do my stuff in-between hair and makeup, check in on the groom etc. She was another angel. An angel who did such beautiful work on my canvas that garnered nothing but praises and compliments!
14 June 2008, 6.45pm: We were 15 minutes late for our tea ceremony with my side of the family but it was all “well worth the wait” (in JH’s words). I changed into my fuchsia pink embroidery tea dress, and headed with the groom for the Jubilee Hall Lounge. Being “Bounapartes”, the family chit-chatter for a good 15 minutes more before we could finally get everyone’s attention and start the tea ceremony with mum’s side of the family. I think Luke must have been overwhelmed – we served at least 30 cups each!
Photographers Terry & Gino suggested that we take some “creative nostalgic” shots in the Jubilee Hall Lounge before receiving our guests at the cocktail area. It was fun, attempting to look serious at Luke for one of the pose, and I can’t wait to see ‘em photos!!!
The cocktail reception outside The Ballroom was astounding too! Our band, 3 sessions, did such a great job entertaining the guests with their instrumental jazzy tunes while I managed to say a few “HIs” before Ethel dragged me away, reminding me of time check to change into the wedding gown. Thank goodness for nannies like her! Hah. I was also grateful that the Queenies took charge of the reception, sorting and escorting the guests. BR was also busy running around, checking that everything was running smoothly, and deepest appreciation to her too. I’m sure all of them must have been feeling burnt-out from the early morning start, but it was very heartening to know that they loved and cared for us so much in their gestures.
The 1st march-in to the Ballroom was different. Perhaps because now Luke & I were marching down as husband and wife for the first time, or that it was a completely different mood & atmosphere from the church, I was actually more eager to start the evening than before. Luke felt and looked better too, after managing to rest a little earlier, and I could sense that he was all ready to boogie and have yet another time of his life too! One of our favourite songs: At Last, played as the doors opened and on top of the dry ice, dazzling shimmering silver strings hanging down from the balloons, there were also TONNES of rose petals tossed over/at/onto us! Everyone was cheering us at their best.
Dinner commenced earlier than we predicted (which is always a good thing) as everyone immersed themselves in the bossa nova tunes played by the band, and feast. I enjoyed the double-boiled soup dish quite a bit (save the sharks!) as well as the deep fried wasabi prawns, before being reminded to change into my cheongsam.
JH was all ready, waiting for me outside the ballroom as the group of us walked back to the suite for the 2nd change of the evening. The girlies, Cecilia & Ethel & Sam were busy cam-whoring while waiting for me to get hair & makeup done. I kept asking if I should wear my girdle or bodysuit beneath the cheong sam, since I went through so much effort to source for a suitable one. It turns out that all 3 girls said I looked fine without anything beneath the cheongsam and realization dawned on me that I had lost more weight in the last 2 days, and could amazingly fit into the cheongsam without any “creases”. Yay! Received plenty of compliments on the cheongsam too :) And again, reminded myself how blessed I was to have Candy as my tailor & designer – she was so perfect that even 1cm of amendment required me having to do another fitting! And I must say after this experience, I do enjoy wearing cheongsams. The cheongsam certainly maketh a woman.
In-between, a very artistic, “wong-kai-wai” video of the wedding morning and church ceremony was shown to the guests. Yang, the videographer, did such a fantastic job that we received lots of praises for the video. The guests absolutely loved it (amazed at the speed of editing), thankful that we didn’t do the common powerpoint slides displaying our baby-to-childhood-to-teenage photos followed by how we met etc. We weren’t for that idea either! And although we hadn’t seen the video ourselves then (we were busy preparing for 2nd march-in!), we were assured that Yang lived up to our expectations. *note: Indeed he did, because when we finally watched in on Monday evening, it brought tears to us. I just had to keep watching & re-watching the video!
“Crazy little thing called LOVE” played as we did our 2nd march-in for the night! The atmosphere still remained lighthearted and happy (nothing serious & sombre) as we proceeded to the stage for the toasting. That night heard 3 beautiful speeches & toasts from people who loved us dearly too: Cheryl-Anne, Helen & Samantha. Hearing those beautiful words being spoken brought tears of joys. Its one thing to know that these people love you, and another to hear for yourself how much they really love you. Luke went on stage and did a thank-you speech which made me choke on my tears silently too. I wasn’t aware of the speech he had prepared. So when he read it – every word spoken was absolutely beautiful. It got most of the family in tears too, as he teared towards the end as well, talking about his late father. He wasn’t afraid to show his emotional, vulnerable side in front of many and seeing that reaffirmed my blessings of marrying such a wonderful man and husband who wasn’t all egoistical, but sens
itive to others as well.
We did away with the traditional yum-seng from table to table, as well as the “standard” table-photography. :) Instead, we mingled with our guests on a more personal level. While most of the relatives had a whale of a time dancing to the “live” music. We were so caught up socializing with our guests that we nearly missed out on bidding our guests goodbye! Time really flies when you’re having so much fun!!
Needless to say, the brothers and jie-meis were the last groups remaining as the night came to an end. The brothers weren’t going to let the groom and the bridal entourage off so easily, after what the girlies did to them this morning. But it was all in good fun and poor bobo had so much to drank that he puked out twice. Being the wifey, I chose to take care of them, got the hotel to bring in some hot water and honey and lemon and panadol, and told the Queenies and Bs that I could not join them for our pre-arranged chill-out session. Even the private place we reserved at INK bar was left empty, as most of us got high/drunk even before stepping out of the ballroom!
Heartfelt gratitude & kudos to our main co-ordinator (and my bestie BR), Jasmine Choo. For a wedding that was put together within months, without engaging a professional wedding coordinator, Jas was utterly helpful in calming me down in the weeks leading up to the wedding, organizing schedule, calling up various vendors and even organizing a memorable hen’s night for me 2 weeks prior to the wedding. I remembered flustering on the day before the wedding about not being able to do all the things I needed to do & Jas suddenly shifted her meetings around just to meet me at the bridal shop. BIG thanks also, to the pro-active Queenies – initiating meet-ups for discussions, Kris – for making time off to ferry me around despite his very busy schedule and ending up being very sick, BFF – for helping me in every little way possible and being utterly supportive during my fittings and makeup trials, Cecilia – for always being there & assisting me in and out of the gown, Sam – for helping with the painting & dresses etc. As well as the many others (the brothers!) who offered help, gave us beautiful gifts, sound advice etc.
It was definitely our wedding to remember. And thank you to every single one of you who contribute to this very special event.
:)
WIP: hair & makeup trial day
I got the day off today and set aside some quality time to (unfortunately NOT sleep in because mom set the alarm at 9.10am!!!) get some wedding preps done such as getting the invitation cards sent out, contacting some vendors, as well as finally meeting my hair & makeup artist for the wedding day, who was such a darling and made the entire trial activity such fun that I totally enjoyed it.
Made the total boo-boo of wearing an entire black ensemble, left the home with 2 big bags in tow (like I was running away for the weekend or some sort), and before hopping into a cab, drenched in perspiration from the heat. JH (the makeup artist) was sweet & waited 20 minutes for me as I rushed down…all panting and in desperate need of a cold glass of water to put out the heat. We started the session with her asking if I had any reference pictures and then explained to me me how she was going to work the makeup from day to night as she build the intensity on the eyes gradually. The 2.5 hours felt so short and fun with the affable JH, who was helpful snapping photos of the 3 different looks and various hairstyles she tried on me. I felt like a diva!!! And I was in awe by the magic she worked on me. It was also interesting to experience how a simple sweep of a fringe or hairdo could change the entire look too!
Meanwhile, Et & mum were such total sweethearts, one sneaking time off to come see her BFF and the other taking time off to ensure her daughter was in good hands. Et was so thrilled and amazed by the final look that she kept exclaiming for the first 5- 10 mintues the moment she saw me. I thought I saw a tear as she said she felt like she was “marrying” her younger sister off. LOL. She even asked twice out loud if I could not marry Luke and her instead! Hah! It was heartening to see a bud feeling so happy for me. Awww.
We couldn’t thank JH enough – Et especially, when JH offered to help her put on false eyelashes on the wedding day. JH must have done such a fantastic job that while on the way to the bridal shop for my 2nd fitting, both Mum and BFF kept stopping in their tracks and looking at me only to let out a little grin before continuing their steps. It was cute. And while I didn’t think I would be into the entire trial makeup & hair thingy, I must admit that the experience today was awesome and made me even more excited about the wedding.
It was great to that JH & myself could get along and communicate well too. She even gave us makeup tips and recommended products that we could use on a daily basis as well as extra items I could get for the actual day just to touch up!
Sooo…next on the list: shopping for accessories & recommended makeup items!
before makeup begins
first look: for the day
exploring hairstyles 
another hairstyle
with BFF
with mum 
wedding-in-progress (WIP) updates!
The past few days have been like the weather forecast gone bad: pretty much like what we’re experiencing currently.
Saturday was like a bright sunny day – perfect for a beach day out. Met up with the bridesmaids for fittings and it went well! The girls looked absolutely pretty in their cream and pink combination while my green cocktail dress (which I was a lil’ hesitant about initially) turned out nicely – complementing mum’s dragon green cheong sam. We looked like a nice happy family of sisters and mum as we snap some ‘family shots’ in the shop – fussing about with each other’s hemline, telling the tailor to cut the slits higher, skirts shorter, bust line lower etc. Women!
Headed out to Riders’ cafe for a nice brunch out and made sure we ordered a dozen spicy buffalo wings this time round. I shared a breakfast plate with Et while Jas, mum and Luke happily settled for their burgers & cinnamon toast. Again it felt like some family meal together and made me feel utterly blessed to have such wonderful company, with wonderful weather on a wonderful day. Hah! Luke went for his much needed massage thereafter while the girls and I waited and wasted time by talking about ways to diet and hen’s night at the couch. Luke could hear our laughter while in the massage room. Thank goodness for walls and doors! :x
Sunday came and went like a cloudy day. The family celebrated mother’s day with lunch at an Indonesian restaurant after Church. It was nice seeing the cute-as-a-button baby Ian and adorable Faith, whom we missed seeing for a while. Spent some quality time with mama before heading to Luke’s to get the wedding invites printed and sorted out. Watching Formula 1 that evening took up most of the time and before I knew it – I was home catching up on my emails.
I had a big shock (or was it anger or disappointment) when I received an email from the Church assigned decorator asking me to appoint a proper florist instead as he could not meet our requirements (pissed me off big time because we had asked previously and they insisted that we could not hire our own florist). He did not say much, except that he would be now taking charge of the altar flowers (which he was also adamant previously that it fell under someone else’s care) and ended with another liner saying he was “…sorry if I(he) wasted your time.” I would have appreciated an offer to help, or a more apologetic note for the last minute notice but oh well.
It’s about a month to the wedding and we had confirmed about 80% of everything, including payment procedures and amount. Yet he did not bother replying to emails / smses that we sent till now. Looking back, perhaps it was a blessing in disguise after all. I can now appoint my own florist and be rest assured that everything will be delivered professionally and yes, at least he told us now instead of 2 weeks’ prior to the wedding day – which would have probably wreck our moods even more. Friends and relatives were utterly helpful too, consoling me over SMS and giving me contacts of various florists. I was entirely overwhelmed by everything that I suffered a major mental breakdown on Sunday night but was soon delivered by God’s grace – and like the same scenario of printing the wedding invites, I may just end up with a better deal and result after all.
The next bomb which dropped came Monday afternoon just when I was about to meet Fay for our much-anticipated lunch at Nanxing. Luke called, sounded absolutely cold and straight to the point – that his mum disliked our cards because it had black elements and demanded that we re-printed everything for her. I was frustrated because I hadn’t fully recovered from the aftermath of the Church decorator suddenly dropping us like that; while Luke was pissed because he knew how much pain and effort I had gone through just to get the cards done and delivered and besides, they were our wedding cards. We had specially printed another set for the mums with their names on it and just because his mum didn’t like black, we had to re-print them?! Mum was really sweet and proactive and quickly contacted the printer asking if she could help to change the colours (since she still had the artwork, thank goodness we sent over a freehand file to her) before calling Luke and reassuring him that the cards could be re-printed within 2 working days. Mum’s actions really helped us out much, especially since work’s at its peak for both Luke & myself – and while I still couldn’t understand the his mum’s sudden demands and hope that this was an isolated incident on top of all the other funny request which we’ve received and got turned down by Luke firmly, it was good to know that the husband stood by me too. BFF was really sweet, knowing that I was having an awfully bad day – came to accompany me for a while after work just so I could let it all out. My eyes were welling up in tears for the entire day and it was good just to let it all out when I finally could, after work. Helen (Luke’s elder sis) was a darling too. She called twice, from the UK, just to ask if everything was in order and if we needed her to probe and speak to her mum on the matter. I really appreciated the help received and knew it was God’s way of showing me how much people around me cared. It was like a stormy day which eventually cleared up with cool weather.
Tuesday felt heavy in the morning with work to be rushed out but got better when evening came as I finally went for my hot yoga session which I missed out for 2 weeks. It was also comforting to receive email and well-wishes from Godma and Jo., sharing with me that I wasn’t alone in all the inevitable that was happening and that things can only get better. Helen also shared with me an advice which made me feel better: there can be perfection in imperfection too. Nice.
Tuesday night also ended perfectly as I finally got myself finishing the entire disc 1 on Cashmere Mafia which Karen had thoughtfully loan me about 3 weeks ago. It was good spending so me-time over the chic-dramedy which I totally enjoyed. Unlike SATC, Cashmere Mafia didn’t have a protagonist and reminded me more about the Queenies because their friendship started off from Uni as well, except that they were 10 – 15 years older than us Queenies! ‘Zoe’s’ character reminded me a lot about myself while ‘Mia’s’ character (the fashionista in the group) reminded me a lot about Mabes .
I eventually succumbed to beauty sleep before continuing on disc 2 (which I will, tonight).
That’s the updates for now. Have a great mid-week peeps!
you learn
It’s been difficult to concentrate on work and everything else lately with all that’s been happening in my life. My eyes are perpetually feeling pins and are very tired, while my back is tensed with stress – I’m unable to relax in any way possible.
Yet again, I got caught up with the wedding preps, which always tend to get me all flustered. That, combined with lack of time, pressure and desperation was not a great feeling at all. And I spoke nothing about it to anyone because I was aware that these could have been prevented if I hadn’t procrastinate initially.
I’d learnt that if I voiced out my troubles and situation to Luke earlier, things might not have escalated. And no, it wasn’t due to pride that I didn’t ask (which coincidentally the topic with Et during lunch yesterday). But because you love someone so much, you do your best to want to take away any additional burden or stress – and take it on yourself to shoulder them. You try to play tough and fight it on – even when it ends up becoming a bigger burden to yourself than before.
No guessing that a lot of tears was involved in last night’s conversation. Luke apologized for raising his voice over the phone earlier – when he suddenly snapped at when I mentioned something which he had assumed was long over. I put up my defense & justification – but gave up when the fight became too tiring for me. And all I did was producing long sobs & sniffles in-between, telling him that it was difficult to calm myself down, and that didn’t mean that I wasn’t apologetic for my part in the argument. I must have been so agitated that I woke up the family with my crying. Mum was utterly sweet, kissing my forehead from time to time and stroking my back as I stuck the phone to my ear and cried my heart out.
I did feel a lot better after letting it out – the tears, the emotions and the troubles.
And Luke yet again, was my angel – helping me in any and every way he could at that moment. And immediately my burden was lighten. We ended the conversation on a good note. I also realize that as a husband, he wasn’t just going to be there for me emotionally, but for every thing else as he repeated his (pre-)vows to me over the phone: be there for me in good times and in bad.
It sucks to be in a rut. But it feels absolutely fantastic when you finally open up to that someone close, and receive help positively. Knowing that she/he got your back covered so that you can fall safely on.
Made me feel like a whim for my immaturity. But hey, its never easy to think straight all the time especially when emotions often overrule everything else. Getting ready for work this morning, while trying to deal with the badly swollen eyes and face made me realize another thing: that my prayer to the Lord some weeks ago were finally answered in his way. I could see the bigger picture too, how everything had built up to me eventually seeking help from Luke out of wits’ end and desperation.
The Lord never fails and just when you think you’re all alone…think again.
hang outs marriage people i love the food barn: Jasmine Choo Kris Kam wedding preps
by natasha
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Wedding Preps – wedding in progress with J & K
I absolutely love my wedding-in-progress sessions when I get to hang out with 2 of my most awesome & dearest people that would give any hoots about me – my #62 & #63. Even if it meant having only 4 hours of sleep and rushing down from Jurong even if I said ‘forget it, don’t come’ or rushing to a venue in a cab just to be on time to meet your pal even if finances were limited.
We had so much fun today. Site reece at at the Nativity Church followed by brunch at the Saddle Club, time flew by so quickly just being in the company of these 2.
